Everyone has domestic disputes. Some are more valid than others. Here is one man's story.
A middle-aged man was sitting at the breakfast table. He had the newspaper and was reading over the previous day's events. While reading the sports section, he wife snuck up behind him. In the middle of a sentence, the man was whacked upside the head with a heavy frying pan, which was wielded by his wife. The man yelped in pain. Holding the most tender part of his skull, the man demanded to know why his wife had struck him. "What was that for?"
His wife scowled at him. "That's for the piece of paper I found in your pants' pocket! The name May Lou was written on it!" Her husband looked at her and then explained, "Two weeks ago I decided to go out to the racetrack. I placed a bet on a horse. The horse's name was Mary Lou. That's where the name came from, dear."
Apologizing to her husband, the wife leaves the man alone and goes about her day cleaning the house and doing laundry. However, the next day the name is sitting, again reading the paper, and his wife whacks him with an even bigger frying pan. This time, the man is knocked unconscious. Eventually, he comes to. "What was that for?!" His head was hurting even more by now and he had a large bump on it from where he had been struck in the head - twice, by this point.
"Your horse called."
Later that night, the man went to the bar and drank most of the night. Eventually, he managed to make his way to the bar. Slurring his words, he bet the bartender that he could piss directly into one of the whisky bottles on one of the bar's shelves. The bartender smiled. "How much?" "Five hundred dollars," the inebriated man replied. "You're on!" Said the bartender. So the drunk man hops up on the bar and gets urine all over the place - on the bartender, the bar, the bottle of alcohol - pretty much everywhere except in the whiskey bottle. The bartender smiles triumphantly and laughs. "Sorry, pal, looks like you lost."
"That's alright!" the drunk man yelled. "I bet all those guys over there one thousand dollars each that I could piss all over you and your bar and still get you to laugh!"
See also:
